And so it is...

So Dan and I have been doing our thing for a little under 2 months. Pretty crazy. Things have been moving incredibly fast which is terrifying, but also extremely exciting. He even said the L-word and the craziest thing is I said it back a little while later. I'd been holding back and wanting to say it. I was in the weirdest place between desperately wanting to say it and to NOT say it. Jaded Rachael = comfy Rachael.

I could tell that he wanted to tell me how he felt, whether that meant actually loving me or whatever, but was holding back. Being that he lives a good hour away, we really have to plan our dates and I hadn't seen him in about a week. We had a fabulous little evening and stayed up late into the evening chatting on the couch, drinking random Trader Joe's wine, and laughing a ton. We were constantly edging on the topic of feelings and love and eluding to being there or close to there all night. I was pretty sure he was going to say those three words, but he didn't. I was both relieved and disappointed. Ha, so typical. We ended up crawling in bed around 3am and crashing until pretty late in the morning. We were sleepy-eyed and sprawled out all over the bed and each other and getting accustomed to the light when he turned to me and said "I love you." Just like that. Out of the blue. It was perfect. We were just exchanging morning pleasantries and then it just rolled off his tongue. Like it was no big deal and he had said it a million times before. It was so much better than some big production with fancy dinners and flowers and DEFINITELY better than a wine-induced-slippery-tongued i love you. Pretty fucking great.

So I'm in unfamiliar territory, but I'm enjoying it.